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In an attempt to gain congressional approval for a top-secret weapons system, Washington lobbyist "Bird" McIntyre teams up with sexy, outspoken neocon Angel Templeton to pit the American public against the Chinese. When Bird fails to uncover an authentic reason to slander the nation, he and Angel put the Washington media machine to work, spreading a rumor that the Chinese secret service is working to assassinate the Dalai Lama.
Meanwhile in China, mild-mannered President Fa Mengyao and his devoted aide Gang are maneuvering desperately against sinister party hard-liners Minister Lo and General Han. Now Fa and Gang must convince the world that the People's Republic is not out to kill the Dalai Lama, while maintaining Fa's small margin of power in the increasingly militaristic environment of the party.
On the home front, Bird must contend with a high-strung wife who entertains Olympic equestrian ambition, and the qualifying competition happens to be taking place in China. As things unravel abroad, Bird and Angel's lie comes dangerously close to reality. And as their relationship rises to a new level, so do mounting tensions between the United States and China.
- Sales Rank: #682642 in Books
- Published on: 2013-05-14
- Released on: 2013-05-14
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.00" h x 1.00" w x 5.25" l, .60 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 352 pages
From Booklist
In his latest novel of bull’s-eye political satire, Buckley (Supreme Courtship, 2008) skewers our adversarial yet symbiotic relationship with China, along with the corruption endemic to lobbying, weapons manufacturing, and media spin. Walter “Bird” McIntyre, lobbyist for an aerospace behemoth, is instructed to “whip up . . . anti-Chinese fervor” to help secure government funding for a new secret weapon. Hapless and endearing, Bird divides his time between the condo he calls the Military-Industrial Duplex and the country estate he dubbed Upkeep, home to his equestrian wife, Alzheimer’s-afflicted mother, and freeloading brother Bewks, a Civil War reenactor, while writing egregiously clichéd thrillers. Bring on sexy-scary hawk and neocon Angel Templeton, and Bird is in more trouble than he concocts for his tough-guy heroes. Vicious confrontations break out on Chris Matthews’ Hardball, the Dalai Lama is in peril, and the eminently reasonable president of China can talk with his trusted aide only in the bathroom with the water running full blast to foil their enemies’ listening devices. Buckley balances bayonet humor and tenderness in this canny and diverting send-up. --Donna Seaman
Review
PRAISE FOR THEY EAT PUPPIES, DON'T THEY?
"Writing comic fiction about world events demands wit and inside knowledge about Washington. It also requires an ability to see the light side of serious issues like China's treatment of Tibet, the death of beloved spiritual leaders and America's financial dependency on China. These are not funny topics, but Christopher Buckley's new novel about them, They Eat Puppies, Don't They?, is hilarious."― USA Today
"With rising concern about China's military buildup and its economic rivalry with the U.S., perhaps the best course of action is to milk the situation for some laughs. And there are laughs aplenty in Christopher Buckley's sendup.... Creators of great works of satire, such as Jonathan Swift and Mark Twain, don't appear often, but Buckley follows in the footsteps of fellow satirist Tom Wolfe in giving readers a delightful perspective on some of the leading issues and social mores of our times."―Associated Press
"Sun Tzu's Chinese classic, 'The Art of War,' gets quite a workout in Christopher Buckley's latest uproarious political farce, fervently quoted by strivers and schemers in both Beijing and Washington."―The New York Times Book Review
"Buckley is at his searing best.... Buckley knows Washington. He knows satire. He knows Dr. Strangelove and how to ratchet up absurdities. As our antiheroes get closer and the stakes climb, the book mixes outrageousness and plausibility like a dirty martini..... this is a funny book, and there's nothing here to displease the devoted Buckley fan. And perhaps it speaks to his skill with satire that as the world teeters toward war, we find ourselves missing his lobbyist."―The Washington Post
"They Eat Puppies, Don't They? cuts deftly between politburo meetings in China and backroom deals in Washington while skewering D.C. pretensions.... Unlike so many other satirists of Beltway culture, Buckley is both deeply informed and deeply funny."―The Wall Street Journal
"Waggishly amusing... It requires a certain measure of audacity to reward that most whacked of political piñatas, the Washington lobbyist, with his day in the sun. But lobbyists and spin doctors have been good to Buckley (see Thank You for Smoking and Boomsday), who reciprocally accords them a mordant admiration akin to that which David Mamet has lavished upon real estate sharks and card sharps."―San Francisco Chronicle
"A hilarious and page-turning story of political absurdity worthy of Dr. Strangelove himself."―The Daily Beast
"A funny, funny book.... Buckley is that rare combination-a brilliant satirist of the first-order and a laugh-out-loud funny writer. They Eat Puppies, Don't They? is one of his best."―Houston Chronicle
"Sharply hilarious, outrageously fun....Outrageous does not mean implausible, however, and Buckley commands the material so convincingly that the reader stops to ponder if some comic invention wasn't something read in the newspaper last week...They Eat Puppies is smart entertainment, too. And seriously funny."―Cleveland Plain Dealer
"World powers get little respect from Christopher Buckley in his latest novel.... And as the title might suggest, there is a lot of humor to be digested...hilarious....The usual disclaimer describes the book as a 'work of fiction,' and one can only hope there are no exceptions to that."―The Oklahoman
"Bulls-eye political satire"
―Booklist
"The title refers to the supposed culinary propensities of the Chinese, but as this novel makes clear, it's said with more than a twist of irony....A lively and politically spirited read."―Kirkus Reviews
""Y0u won't really be fond of any of the characters in Christopher Buckley's satire 'They Eat Puppies, Don't They?' But you will have a ball reading about their shenanigans.―Fredericksburg Free Lance-Star
"Christopher Buckley, amuser-in-chief...Buckley's latest foray into international affairs is entertaining and topical. It cuts close to the bone, funny and otherwise."―Pittsburgh Post-Gazette
"A well-built addition to Buckley's oeuvre"―Publishers Weekly
PRAISE FOR CHRISTOPHER BUCKLEY
"One of the funniest writers in the English language."―Tom Wolfe
"A Benchley with WordPerfect."―John Updike
"An effervescent joy."―Joseph Heller
"Christopher Buckley is the nation's best humor novelist."―Christian Science Monitor
"Christopher Buckley doesn't merely observe the zeitgeist better than anyone else on the planet. He anticipates it-and routinely has a new novel finished at the precise moment when everyone else is about to notice that something is afoot."―National Review
"Each of his novels may be light as air, but bit by bit they're building up into a significant social portrait, the beginnings of a vast Comédie-Washingtonienne . . . At a time of high political absurdity, Buckley remains our sharpest guide to the capital, and amore serious one than we may suppose."―Blake Wilson, New York Times Book Review
"As Jon Stewart proves, Washington is an easy target to satirize with its hypocrisy, ego-powered politicians and endless hot-air emissions. What sets Buckley apart is his ability to mock Washington yet convey a genuine admiration for many of its residents . . . Buckley remains hilarious."―USA Today
"Hilarious . . . full of wry observations on the follies of Washington high life. What makes it laugh-out-loud funny is Buckley's sense of how little you have to exaggerate to make Washington seem absurd."―New York Daily News
"You can't make this stuff up . . . Unless of course you are Christopher Buckley, son of the late William, whose fictional satires are must-reads for those looking to understand our cultural moment, or at least have a few laughs at it. Buckley is a master at cooking up scenarios that are wild without being entirely absurd and populating them with attractive characters."―Chicago Sun Times
"The quintessential political novelist of our time."―Fortune
About the Author
Christopher Buckley was born in New York City in 1952. He was educated at Portsmouth Abbey, worked on a Norwegian tramp freighter and graduated cum laude from Yale. At age 24 he was managing editor of Esquire magazine; at 29, chief speechwriter to the Vice President of the United States, George H.W. Bush. He was the founding editor of Forbes FYI magazine (now ForbesLife), where he is now editor-at-large.
He is the author of fifteen books, which have translated into sixteen languages. They include: Steaming To Bamboola, The White House Mess, Wet Work, God Is My Broker, Little Green Men, No Way To Treat a First Lady, Florence of Arabia, Boomsday, Supreme Courtship, Losing Mum And Pup: A Memoir and Thank You For Smoking, which was made into a movie in 2005. Most have been named New York Times Notable Books of the Year.
He has written for The New York Times, Washington Post, Wall Street Journal, The New Yorker, Atlantic Monthly, Time, Newsweek, Vanity Fair, National Geographic, New York Magazine, The Washington Monthly, Forbes, Esquire, Vogue,Daily Beast and other publications.
He received the Washington Irving Prize for Literary Excellence and the Thurber Prize for American Humor. He lives in Connecticut.
Most helpful customer reviews
27 of 29 people found the following review helpful.
Half an hour after finishing, you'll want to read it again
By Susan Tunis
After reviewing the last few Christopher Buckley novels, I'm not sure how many new ways I can come up with saying, "Oh my gosh, this guy is funny!" I started laughing while reading the list of players at the front of the novel. ("Winnie Chang, chair, U.S.-China Co-Dependency Council") I chuckled over the novel's opening sentence. ("The senator from the great state of New York had been droning on for over five minutes, droning about drones.") I think part of my appreciation of Buckley's satire is that I'm a native Washingtonian. Buckley gets DC, the way that Armisted Maupin gets San Francisco--but, like the city he writes about, without all the heart.
In They Eat Puppies, Don't They?, Mr. Buckley is returning to several themes we've seen before. He goes after some of the same targets, too: politicians, the media, Hollywood, reality television, pundits, trophy wives, the uninformed populace, and--of course--novelists. Who can blame him? They all make such inviting targets!
The protagonist at the heart of this novel feels familiar, as well. Lobbyist "Bird" McIntyre shares some of the same DNA as the delightfully unrepentant Nick Naylor in Thank You for Smoking. Both men have an unpopular job to do, and they take pride in their work. Bird is a defense lobbyist. After Congress shoots down his employer's latest big budget defense project in the novel's opening scene, he fears for his job. Fortunately, his employer has something even bigger, more deadly, and more top-secret up his sleeve. It's so top-secret that he won't even tell Bird. Instead, he sets Bird up in a shill foundation called Pan-Pacific Solutions, where he is tasked with rustling up some anti-China sentiment to grease the wheels for this next project's appropriations.
To accomplish this task, Bird teams up with the mediagenic Angel Templeton, the Coulter-esque hottie from the Institute for Continuing Conflict. Bird pitches her:
"Friday I stayed up until the roosters started, doing research. The Dalai Lama is the one thing having to do with China that Americans actually care about. Human rights? Zzzzz. Terrible working conditions in Chinese factories? Zzzzz. Where's my iPad? Global warming? Zzzzzz. Taiwan? Wasn't that some novel by James Clavell? Zzzzzz. When's the last time you heard anyone say, `We really must go to war with China over Taiwan'? But the Dalai Lama? Americans LOVE that guy. The whole world loves him. What's not to love? He's a seventy-five-year-old sweetie pie with glasses, plus the sandals and the saffron robe and the hugging and the mandalas and the peace and harmony and the reincarnation and nirvana. All that. We can't get enough of him. If the American public were told that those rotten Commie swines in Beijing were"--Bird lowered his voice--"putting... whatever, arsenic, radioactive pellets, in his yak butter, you don't think that would cause a little firestorm out there in public-opinion land?"
And they're off to the races! Buckley's tale is the perfect intersection of absurd and smart. It's outlandish and uproarious. It's just crazy enough to be true. It's obvious that Buckley has a great grasp of the issues in order to be so effective in skewering all of the players. They Eat Puppies, Don't They? reads like a novel-length Doonesbury strip, and I laughed long and loud all the way through it. Some of Mr. Buckley's recent novels have felt a bit like "Buckley light." Not this one. This is the real deal. It's smart, it's funny, and it's biting. This may be his best satire in years.
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful.
Flashes of brilliance, but the hero is too bland and passive
By Andrew C Wheeler
Christopher Buckley is one of the great humorous novelists of his generation -- that would be the Boomers, for anyone keeping score -- though he's only good for a novel every few years; THEY EAT PUPPIES, DON'T THEY? is only his ninth novel since The White House Mess in 1986. But, like all great humorists, he has his blind spots -- in particular, Buckley has struggled with writing believable female characters, particularly viewpoint characters. His novels are all about politics, which he sees through a subtly right-wing lens. And, except for his best novel, Thank You for Smoking, he's been hesitant to go for the jugular, the way the writer of satirical novels about the US government should, so his books often land softly rather than stabbing into the ground as they might.
Still, he's both authentically funny and well-grounded in actual Washington power politics: even if he does pull his punches some of the time, he knows where to land them so they still do some damage. His books are usually vaguely timely -- Boomsday was about the looming Boomer retirement wave, and what that will mean for the generation struggling to pay for their benefits, while Supreme Courtship anticipated the hearings over Justice Sotomayor in its own twisted way -- but focused on the big picture rather than specific events [1]. And so THEY EAT PUPPIES is his China novel.
Buckley's heroes tend to be thinly drawn nice guys in nasty jobs, and THEY EAT PUPPIES's "Bird" McIntyre is another in that line: he's a lobbyist for a defense contractor (shades of THANK YOU), but the plot of the book follows him setting up a shell foundation (shades of Super PACs) to influence Congress and public opinion in a way which will benefit the big contractor that has supposedly just removed itself from his services. Bird's new foundation is primarily devoted to ginning up outrage about China -- for reasons Bird himself doesn't know -- and so he gets caught up in the web of THEY EAT PUPPIES's other main character, Angel Templeton. Angel is a fever dream version of Ann Coulter, as powerful and connected as Democrats fear she is and as sexually and personally compelling as Republicans are sure she is, running her own organization which Buckley pretty much bluntly says wants to start any war it possibly can, anywhere. (Buckley is some variety of conservative, but it's clear he's no Boltonesque neocon.)
Bird and Angel luck into a health scare of the Dalai Lama -- everyone loves inoffensive aged spiritual figures -- and work that up into a full-fledged media attack on China, starting with a vaguely plausible rumor that the Chinese are trying to assassinate the Lama and working up from there. Wacky hijinks ensue, as they must -- Bird is supposedly a master of spin, though he spends the entire book off-balance, either because of Angel or because of his high-maintenance horsey wife Myndi, which unfortunately makes him one of Buckley's more ineffectual heroes. Things happen to Bird, as they usually do in a Buckley novel, but he never drives the plot forward; he's just the guy bobbing to the top of the stream. I'm sorry to say that Bird is also a would-be technothriller novelist, and that Buckley gives us several examples of his deathless prose -- it's as awful as we expect, but not as funny as I think Buckley intended.
Buckley is best when his scenes jump around the world at high speed, when he moves from the Chinese President's insomnia to the travails of the unnamed US President's national security advisor. Even Angel -- who is unrealistic as a real person, but a fabulous creation for a satirical novel -- is more interesting than supposedly relatable sad sack Bird. Buckley could have a really great, utterly cutting novel -- or more than one -- in him, but he needs to let go of heroes to set that novel free: his characters are much more engaging when he's not trying to make us like them, and his worlds work better the more of those self-obsessed workaholic borderline lunatics we run into.
THEY EAT PUPPIES has another soft landing -- reminiscent of Little Green Men -- as Bird is battered by the outside world and simultaneously comes to a personal epiphany. That last is a shame; Buckley's worlds are so jaundiced and mean-spirited that being nice in one of them is a major failing -- it would be much better if Bird were to benefit hugely from all of his manipulations and be sucked even deeper into the bleak world of the defense contractor. This is certainly a funny and knowing novel of politics and international strife, entirely entertaining as it goes. But the reader can also see in it the outlines of an even funnier, tougher novel that Buckley could have written, which puts the slightest of dampers on the fun.
[1] It's telling that not one of Buckley's novels takes place during an election year; they're all about people in office rather than fighting for it.
14 of 16 people found the following review helpful.
Good start, petered out to an unsatisfying end
By Charles Engelke
If you liked Thank You for Smoking, you'll like the first third of this book. But after that it falls a bit flat. The characters never really gel, and the situations don't come to much of a resolution. In fact, there are so many promising hints that go nowhere that I wonder if the Kindle edition is missing some content.
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